In Episode 56, we announce that Fucking Cancelled has moved to substack! Please follow us fuckingcancelled.substack.com if you haven’t already, and consider becoming a supporter of the pod for $5 Canadian a month. You’ll get a bunch of bonus content and help keep the podcast alive! After this announcement we discuss Clementine’s attunement model of consent, which she wrote about in her zine, The Forgotten Art of Fucking. This model includes: attunement, shared responsibility, mixed styles of communication, valuing the erotic, and recognizing the inherent risk in sexuality. Clementine offers this model as an alternative to the contractual model of consent that defines consent only as ongoing verbal asking throughout sex.
Wow. I literally got tears in my eyes listening to this last night while driving home from a 12 Step meeting. I am so impressed at the hosts' willingness to speak aloud their "spicy" thoughts on issues that so many of us have been badgered into treating as radioactive. And the thing is, there's ZERO wrong with what's being said ... it's just that common sense and compassion seem to have fled certain corners of the world. I'm a white married older guy (the horror! the horror!) who is, if not bi, then het-flexible (or something ... I have no clue, exactly) who is perfectly happy to be the "top" but also very much would enjoy, appreciate and like to NOT have to play that role in the "hetero script" 24/7/365. I recognize the script is BS conditioning, but it's surprising how unreceptive people can be to even the mildest disruption of it. And thank you thank you THANK YOU for the acknowledgement that the "bottom" has an obligation to communicate with their "top" — and that not finding a way to do so is, in fact, a violation of the top's consent (assuming the top is one who very much wants not to overstep boundaries, cause harm, etc.). I could go on and on. This episode was so rich with honesty and affirmation for me that I just subscribed.
Wow. I literally got tears in my eyes listening to this last night while driving home from a 12 Step meeting. I am so impressed at the hosts' willingness to speak aloud their "spicy" thoughts on issues that so many of us have been badgered into treating as radioactive. And the thing is, there's ZERO wrong with what's being said ... it's just that common sense and compassion seem to have fled certain corners of the world. I'm a white married older guy (the horror! the horror!) who is, if not bi, then het-flexible (or something ... I have no clue, exactly) who is perfectly happy to be the "top" but also very much would enjoy, appreciate and like to NOT have to play that role in the "hetero script" 24/7/365. I recognize the script is BS conditioning, but it's surprising how unreceptive people can be to even the mildest disruption of it. And thank you thank you THANK YOU for the acknowledgement that the "bottom" has an obligation to communicate with their "top" — and that not finding a way to do so is, in fact, a violation of the top's consent (assuming the top is one who very much wants not to overstep boundaries, cause harm, etc.). I could go on and on. This episode was so rich with honesty and affirmation for me that I just subscribed.
Do we need to resubscribe on substack if we're already subscribed on Patreon or does our membership automatically switch over?